Episode 30: The One Where We Have 98 Unread Texts

If you feel overwhelmed by texts, messages, and constant communication, or you’ve ever wondered why you avoid replying even when you care, this episode will feel very familiar. The conversation turns into a surprisingly honest look at texting anxiety, communication styles, and how different people manage relationships, work, and boundaries in a hyper-connected world. From unread messages and team communication tools to dating ideas like the “sticky eye” method and handing out photo cards, things get funny, chaotic, and unexpectedly insightful. It’s real life, real friendship, and real opinions. You’ll laugh, cringe, and totally relate.

Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:00

Hi, I'm Karina, and right now I have zero unread text messages.

SPEAKER_00 0:07

That's impressive. Um yeah. Hi, I'm Nikki. Um text messages are not usually pro my problem. I only have five, but I will say that I know that two of them are from I know one's at least like six months ago. It's a voice message. Don't send me voice messages. It's too much effort. Just let me read it.

SPEAKER_02 0:27

Six months ago though, Nick. Yeah, I know. Do you want to play it out loud on the podcast?

SPEAKER_00 0:32

I don't really I mean this person probably figured out who they are, but like And it's not because I don't want to hear from them. There's just something for me that voice messages, it's just too much work for me. It's too much work.

SPEAKER_02 0:44

Yeah, it's called text message for a reason, like texting.

SPEAKER_00 0:47

Yeah, I understand that voice messaging is more convenient for other people, but it is inconvenient for me. And therefore I wait six months to read it. Oh, my mic is nowhere near me. Can you see your mirror okay? Yeah, we could hear you fine. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 0:59

Yeah. So this is not how I expected this to go. Hi, I'm Natalie, and I have 98 unread text messages.

SPEAKER_03 1:09

I just thought you guys would have the same amount. Like, don't even get me started on emails. Like, how do you keep up with it? Oh, it's just a lot. How do you have 98? That's my I don't know. Like we can go through them. Is it like actual people?

SPEAKER_04 1:23

I'm like actually starting to feel very special that you answer my text message.

SPEAKER_02 1:29

I think if somebody does get a text message from me, you are on like the A list, honestly. Like, I mean, five of them are unread that just came through 10 minutes ago. Nikki, didn't you just send a bunch of texts? I did send a bunch of texts.

SPEAKER_00 1:41

I'm looking for some help or your opinions on the website design.

SPEAKER_02 1:44

I will take a look at that. Yes. I don't know. It's like everybody texts and it's just a lot.

SPEAKER_00 1:50

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 1:51

It feels energy draining to try to keep up with it all.

SPEAKER_00 1:54

Now, here is what I find interesting. As uh for those who are not in the know, I'm actually staying at Natalie's house right now. Karina's with us for a while. She has left. Um, so I'm at Natalie's house. You have way more phone conversations than I do. Like way more phone conversation. I probably talk to like my mom on the phone once a week. Oh. But you are you have a lot of phone conversations. I do. Whereas I definitely default more to text.

SPEAKER_02 2:23

Yeah. I think if you're like A plus plus plus in my life, like somehow like in that inner inner circle, like of I don't know, I have a brother, I have a sister, I have a best friend. Like we we talk almost daily, pretty much daily.

SPEAKER_00 2:38

I mean, I have all of those except for a sister, but I still like we text.

SPEAKER_02 2:42

I was just gonna say how do you explain all the details and stuff? Like yesterday something happened and I needed to talk to my sister about what do you think about this? Like there's details that would be too hard to type it all out. I suppose so.

SPEAKER_04 2:54

I hate talking on the phone. You guys, like I rarely talk on the phone. Josh doesn't, and Josh called me this morning only because he was driving just to say, hey, I forgot I took your credit card last night when we were at dinner. I you were talking to someone, so I just put it in my pocket. I just want to make sure you're good with that. And I was like, Yes, that was the extent of the conversation. Like, I we do not phone calls are not my thing. But you live with him, that makes sense. I know, but like anybody else, I I don't talk to I What about your sisters? We all Marco Polo.

SPEAKER_02 3:27

Yeah, I guess my neither one of my siblings are tech savvy. And my tech savvy, like they don't know how to even operate a basic phone. So I guess I just have to keep the old school style mentality.

SPEAKER_04 3:38

And maybe that's why texting isn't as important to you. I feel like I have to stay up on my text because it keeps me up to date with everybody, including my college kids, my sisters, like because none of us have time to be on the phone with each other.

SPEAKER_02 3:52

Yeah. And it just feels like if I responded to every message when it came in, I would never get anything done or do my priorities. But uh recently something happened that I was like, oh, I do need to be more careful. So remember, I did that pickleball tournament with my new LDS friend who's amazing, and we lost it in the gold medal match. Well, I hadn't seen her or played with her since then until Wednesday morning. Some girl invited a group of four of us and she was one of them. And I showed up and she's like, Oh my gosh, I haven't seen you or talked to you since the event. She goes, I thought you were mad at me and never wanted to play with me again. And I was like, What are you talking about? Of course I'm not mad at you or want to play with you again. So after that day was over, I said I sent her a text to say, Hey, I'm so glad we played again. I could never be mad at you. And I realized she had texted me and I never responded. I had texted me weeks ago and I never responded, but it wasn't because I didn't mean to. It was because I just didn't like have that bandwidth in that moment.

SPEAKER_04 4:48

I am not surprised, Natalie. Like I would also think, because I'm such a quick text turnaround person, like I'd rather have the last message than leave someone hanging. I am not surprised that she thought you were mad at her. Because when someone leaves me hanging, I'm like, oh shoot, did I do something? And I'm not sure what I did.

SPEAKER_00 5:09

Well, I mean, I also think there's also a personality thing in there, right? Like I don't, or and if people know you a little bit better. Like, I I think there's also if one defaults to assuming that people are angry at them, then I think that would be a good idea.

SPEAKER_02 5:22

We're newer friends, right? So we're newer friends, so maybe that's part of it. Um, but yeah, I think I'm gonna text her today and say, Happy Friday, just so you know I still love you.

SPEAKER_04 5:31

That's that's a good idea, Natalie. Also, not just newer friends. This is the first time I like we've been friends for how long? And this is the first time I'm hearing about this texting thing. So now I will not take it personally, not that I ever have, if you don't text back, because now I see how you are. Like that, like now that I know it doesn't bother me.

SPEAKER_02 5:49

It's just like I'm always on the go sort of talks to respond back in a text. That's why I like polo, because I could just be doing whatever I want and still talk it back. But texting is a little, it's it's strange.

SPEAKER_00 5:59

It feels more deliberate and time consuming. Yeah. See, I like it because I'm often in front of my computer. So if a text comes in, then I can type the answer and don't, you know, like the typing on the phone takes forever. But if I can just type the answer into my computer, boom, it's good. Like rarely without my computer, let's be honest.

SPEAKER_04 6:17

I have too many things happening via text. The other thing is my whole team communicates via we used to be on Slack, but we moved to Google Chat. And uh some of my team members have my phone number because something will happen and I'll be like, uh, I just need to send a text to Julie or Asia and be like, hey, will you check this? Because nothing's coming through. It's like an emergency. And the same for me, for them. So I just feel like I'm a little bit on call, but it doesn't bother me because Josh is texting me, the kids are texting me. I mean, Charlie is sick today, so he's got the phone, so I've got to kind of pay attention to my phone because if he it gets really sick in there, I'm leaving this podcast. Sorry, guys, and running into the house.

SPEAKER_02 7:01

So, like that's why with my team, and not that I have a big team, but we use Voxer.

SPEAKER_00 7:06

So the only people who vote me are oh that's like, oh, wait, Natalie, did you freeze? I think you froze. Natalie froze, and so now Nikki froze, then here's then great. Now here's what I think about Voxer. No, that's like my worst nightmare. I hate Voxer. If I don't like voice text, then I absolutely don't like voice messages. Also, by the way, if somebody sends a voice message via Instagram and you don't listen to it within 24 hours, like it just deletes it. It shows you that it was there, but you can't get it. And then you have to come back to someone and be like, um, sorry, I didn't listen to it. Instagram penalized me. I feel like I should knock on the window and be like, we can't.

SPEAKER_04 7:43

I'm like, Nikki, you're like, she's outside and you're inside. You should go tell her that her her thing is frozen.

SPEAKER_02 7:53

It kids my phone, my my phone overheated, and so my phone shut off. I should not lay out as I'm doing a podcast. I apologize to all of our listeners and to my lovely co-hosts.

SPEAKER_00 8:08

Well, it's okay. I tried, I did, but I did the same thing. Like I tried it so beautiful. I tried to sit outside, even in the shade, and I'm very comfortable with my computer's like, no, no, it's too much. No. So I get it.

SPEAKER_04 8:20

Well, you were talking about it.

SPEAKER_02 8:23

It was you were talking about so yeah, so like Voxer. So like the only people who have Voxer are on my team. And if it's something that you cannot use are like we use Monday and like communicate on projects and all that, if it's something for some reason it's urgent and I need to know, Voxer, because it makes different sound, I'll get a notification, it won't mix in with my unread text messages. Nobody boxers me except for my team. So, like, that's just my one like alarm. Like, if voxer goes off, what's happening?

SPEAKER_04 8:53

Yeah, Nikki was just talking about how Voxer is her worst nightmare, and actually it's mine as well. This really goes to show nothing but voice messages.

SPEAKER_02 9:01

Yeah, leadership styles are so different, it's very fascinating. This is horrible. See, maybe I'm a bad leader. We should talk about leadership styles. I do not allow them to leave voice messages.

SPEAKER_00 9:13

Wait, they can voxer, but they can't. Is that the whole point? Oh, it's a text.

SPEAKER_02 9:18

Yeah, they text me on Voxer.

SPEAKER_00 9:20

Okay, okay, all right.

SPEAKER_04 9:22

Well, see that. That's like Google chat for me, right? So I can see everybody's stuff.

SPEAKER_02 9:26

But you have to be on the computer, no?

SPEAKER_04 9:29

No, we have Google chat on your phone. It's like Slack or anything else.

SPEAKER_02 9:32

It's just so like that's what we would use Monday for.

SPEAKER_00 9:36

Yeah, we got rid of Monday.

SPEAKER_02 9:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:39

Gotcha. We still see we still use Asana. Although honestly, I use Asana, and then I also use a Google Doc with my tasks for the day so that I can cross things off on my Google Doc and also check things off in Asana because I need all of the support that I can get. Well, that's that's why I have the physical list.

SPEAKER_04 9:55

Yes. Well, that's why we moved to Google Chat because there's a task menu on the side so you can assign other people tasks instead of the routine boards, which is what we were doing in Monday.com. And it just works. I don't know if it's gonna work for a big team. Monday.com was better when we were a much bigger team, but you know, we're a team of 10, and that works so much better. Like just being able to see everyone's tasks right there, and I can see them when they completed them. I don't know. I just really like it. Also, it will show up on your Google Calendar if you want those tasks.

SPEAKER_02 10:27

Yeah, I feel like if it wasn't for the YouTube production, like how many steps are in our YouTube production and how once they somebody clicks off their portion, it alerts the other portion. Like I would get rid of Monday if it wasn't for how we set up our YouTube production um board, it is so good. And honestly, Nikki, it's because of Caitlin. Caitlin set us up with it. Like Caitlin walked us through how to do that, and so it's just like it communicates with the video editor, is ready for it to be video uh edited, the thumbnails ready to be produced, the A-B testing is set, like everything is just like so beautiful. I can't imagine taking the time to like move it over to something different right now.

SPEAKER_04 11:01

We had something similar, but it was for our podcast because it required so many steps, and we moved it to an Excel sheet, and I've been surprised it totally has worked. I thought we could we would die not having it in Monday.com. And we, because of the university, we moved because we have like a main operations manual that then goes to all the different playbooks and processes, it just makes more sense. Everything was getting lost in Monday, everybody couldn't because it was so complicated. And I was like, oh, if we're gonna be this complicated, then we need an operations manual. Once we put the operations manual and we were like tagging all the Monday.com boards, we're like, well, the point of Monday.com is that it's supposed to be all easy to find. Might as well just have Excel sheets. So, and we were spending $200 a month on Monday. That's a lot. I play it.

SPEAKER_00 11:49

We definitely don't spend that much on Asana. At least I don't think we do. I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 11:54

Anyway, this whole conversation came about because last night I was trouble sleeping, I was having trouble sleeping, and I started going through all my Instagram feed messages. And Nikki, Natalie, and I have like a three of cups one, then we have one that like attaches to my family feed, and then we have like one, we have like three.

SPEAKER_00 12:11

The problem is that each of you have three different Instagram profiles. I am a simple woman and have only one Instagram profile. And I when I get on and I want to send you something very funny or very useful, more often very funny. I try to pick the right one, but I also just pick what Instagram pulls up for me.

SPEAKER_04 12:30

I'm good with it. I so my decision last night to was to scroll, which I I actually am not a big scroller, especially because I have so much pre-planned scheduling stuff happening, so I don't have to ever get on Instagram. But last night my choice was to scroll before bed. And so I opened up all of our feeds and both of you sent me some amazing reels that I had not watched yet. And one of them, if we dare get into it, was about how to get a guy to come over and talk to you if you're at a party. And I was like, this is amazing. And so this girl's methodology, what does she call it again, Nikki? I think she called it the sticky eye, which is I like it. I mean sticky eye. Okay, so here's the basic premise, and I thought it was really good. You basically you find someone that you're interested in at a party, but you're you know, you're nowhere near them. Problem number one, let's be honest. Problem number one.

SPEAKER_00 13:24

What's problem number one? Problem number one, actually seeing a guy out and about that you're like, hey, well, now wait a minute here.

SPEAKER_04 13:30

Oh, I thought it was gonna be um invited to a party.

SPEAKER_02 13:34

I was like, oh bad.

SPEAKER_00 13:39

I thought you were saying that. I was like, wait, why did you think I was saying that? Because you think that no one should invite me to parties, very fun parties sometimes. There's there's there's alcohol at these parties, right? Okay, just checking.

SPEAKER_04 13:54

Okay, so um she says that you do the quickest glance over, and when he notices, then you look away, like immediately. Like, like, whoa, you got caught. Okay. Then very soon after, you look at him, and you do not. This is the sticky part, you do not look away until he's gotta be that he looks back. He looks back, but then he like you're not the first to look away. He has to be the first one to look away. I think that's what it is. So it's really hard. It's really hard. That's why it's called sticky eye, because she was like, This is the hardest part. You have to keep looking until he looks away. And she was like, I feel like that should be called the crazy eye.

SPEAKER_00 14:42

Like, imagine it the other way.

SPEAKER_04 14:44

I'm gonna Google this too, staring at you like that. Well, so then I mean, she's very smart because she says, She was like almost, she was like, I've tested this a million times. She was like, it totally works 95% of the time. Because then you look away, and she was like, Somewhere in that next little bit, he will be standing in front of you because he'll be like, Hey. And she was like, Now, this is the part that's hard. You have to have a line ready. Like, oh, I thought you were someone I knew. Like, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 15:11

Oh, but that seems so dismissive. Because then he'd be like, Oh, I'm not someone, I guess I'm gonna go back to the first time.

SPEAKER_02 15:17

Listen, according to whoever created this, it promises to make the guy approach you within 45 seconds.

SPEAKER_00 15:25

Yes, 45 seconds.

SPEAKER_02 15:27

We should like maybe experiment. Karina, will you do this? Nikki, this is your challenge when we go out.

SPEAKER_04 15:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:34

I mean, I wish I was with the three of you because I have a feeling it works even for married people because I almost as if you could be with us and flew in on Tuesday and then flew out with me on Friday for three weeks now.

SPEAKER_04 15:47

Nikki has been working on me. Like she's like, at any point, Karina, you can get on a plane and come back. I came real close.

SPEAKER_00 15:56

I was doing really well the other day. Was that yesterday? You were you were checking flights. Natalie was actually you know off living her life, and I was uh using my my uh my persuasion techniques on Karina.

SPEAKER_04 16:11

It was it was real close. I was like, there were just a couple of things on the calendar that made it so I was like, oh, I can't leave until Tuesday night because I have a big interview, and I'd have to be back Friday morning for a doctor's appointment. I really don't think you do.

SPEAKER_00 16:23

This is really I was like, this is really impossible. The appointment you have to come back for on Friday should 100% be a telehealth. It's it's a, hey, how are you on this new medication? I'm fine, great, thanks. Have a nice weekend. And then 100% telehealth.

SPEAKER_04 16:39

I mean, like, because I was like, oh, I can just like drive with Nikki all the way back to Salt Lake because she's just coming to stay in my barn. But that's why it also felt really stupid. I'm like, wait, I'm gonna fly down there on Tuesday to drive with Nikki all day so that she could be at my house.

SPEAKER_00 16:52

And we would listen to business books and we would strategize and we would like to. Okay, back to this. I was real close, Nat. Real close.

unknown 17:02

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 17:02

I did a good job.

SPEAKER_04 17:03

Back to this thing. I I think I would love to see you two try this because here's the thing like what's what's the big deal, whether it works or not. You know what I mean? Like, just practice it. If you're in a bar, you're at pickleball. I just think it probably works.

SPEAKER_01 17:22

Well, there is a tip for success that Google is telling me about or Gemini.

SPEAKER_02 17:26

Um, keep the gaze intense but not overly aggressive to avoid looking creepy. Okay. It also says that this technique can be used during networking events to encourage conversation.

SPEAKER_04 17:41

Yeah, I that's what I was thinking about it for because I was just like, well, I'm married, I'm not looking for someone, but I was like, whoa, this is like a great idea.

SPEAKER_00 17:48

If there's like a someone I want to meet, I could just and actually thinking if somebody did that to me at a networking event, I would think that it was we're not talking about networking at that point. You know what I mean? Like it's some pretty aggressive eye contact for just I would do that to another woman.

SPEAKER_04 18:06

Let's try. I'm gonna try it, you guys. I have a lot of things coming up, and I'm gonna try it. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 18:11

And I think you're gonna end up with a girlfriend. You're gonna be like Josh. So I've invited a woman into our relationship.

SPEAKER_04 18:21

How do you feel? So let's talk about the second reel that Nikki sent that we have not talked about that I was like obsessed with. And I was like, you two should start this literally today.

SPEAKER_00 18:33

Oh, what is that we should do? I'm hearing, I'm hearing a lot of that, but continue.

SPEAKER_04 18:37

Well, I'm not single. You sent me these things clearly to help me promote you doing these things.

SPEAKER_00 18:45

Oh, I can't wait to hear. Subconsciously, that maybe okay.

SPEAKER_04 18:48

They were like, this works so good. It was like the two girls, and what they did was they used to take Polaroids, but they said they just took pictures and on the back of them, they put their name and their phone number. And so they just started handing them out like business cards.

SPEAKER_02 19:02

Wait, I don't understand. They took pictures of what?

SPEAKER_04 19:04

They're it's a picture of them, like a black and white picture of them. And on the back of this little tiny card, I mean it's tiny, like it looked like one and a half inches by one and a half inch squares. They wrote their phone number on it and like their name. And they started handing out, they were in a park or something, handing out to guys they thought were cute. And soon it became like the thing. Like boys were like coming up to them, being like, hey, like, like they wanted one of these cards. Like, so they made it like a thing.

SPEAKER_02 19:31

And obviously, I can see that working really well. Like, cause I think it takes the pressure off the guy, like it's okay, you could call me. I clearly find you attractive. I think you would easily get texts and phone calls that way.

SPEAKER_00 19:42

I was gonna say, I feel like you need a burner phone though, because if someone's like, Yeah, oh, this is interesting, and then they set it aside, you're gonna get some weird shit. It's gonna be a Google Voice number.

SPEAKER_04 19:50

Google voice. Yeah, something, but either I was just like, wait, that's brilliant because it's like it opens up the field, it's not that big of a deal. And also, like, I mean, I think they were correct in this. Like, wouldn't you feel special if a guy handed you his number in that way and it had his picture on it? So it's not like, oh, this is like I can't remember what he looks like. It's like, oh, I remember what they look like.

SPEAKER_02 20:15

Can we take it next level? Oh, oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 20:19

So we create a page so that when they Google image your picture, it's like to a landing page of testimonials of how witty you are and how lovely the first date experience was. And she was the one that got away. You know, it's basically like a five-star review page because you know people are gonna Google image that, isn't that? Like, hey, so you're looking for me, are you? You could do a it would be like, yeah, exactly. Instead of looking on the internet for me, you could just call that number that's on the back of the photo you have, you know, like because you know, like it's gonna land a hit.

SPEAKER_04 20:55

Wait, that's really cute. That is like the cutest thing ever. Oh, guys, my oldest daughter just arrived. Come here. Hey, Siri. This is uh the first family member to say hi on the podcast. Say hi. Hi, Siri.

SPEAKER_01 21:10

Are you going back home? Yeah, I need to. Did you say I could turn it? No, I haven't yet. I think it's okay.

SPEAKER_00 21:16

Be careful, he's sick. Don't get too close.

SPEAKER_04 21:25

Love you. Hi, sweetie piece.

SPEAKER_00 21:30

Josh is so jealous he's not the first to get a family member on. I can just I can feel him listening to this episode being like.

SPEAKER_02 21:57

So if you are listening and you are a guy, you can

SPEAKER_00 22:00

send us a message through fan mail right through whatever app you listen to this podcast on thank you yes I feel like Melody's boyfriend might be uh might be a a candidate he's a good guy you guys might have to interview him first just to verify but also he's been he's been single more recently you know also I like that we don't know him so well yeah so and he doesn't know us so well so it's a little bit more I think it's gonna be real I think we would I think we should bring on also then Melody as well because it would be weird to be like so we're gonna be on a podcast with your boyfriend but not you but we might have to keep her on mute because uh it's be interesting because I mean they're they're dating right but it's still relatively new she just introduced him to the girls it's very exciting I hate that I wasn't there for it um insert myself into their relationship uh but but also I don't know I mean he he seems very genuine very much himself but would he be on his best behavior in front of her I mean maybe she can have like a BS meter in the background and like tell us like how far on the BS meter he's got her paddles like BS legit.

SPEAKER_04 23:08

But we don't want him to see her that's the problem that's true that's true that's true. It would be really easy to have her set up like on Google Meet on all our phones where we could see her and have him on Zoom. I like that we're all planning this out I don't know how this is really gonna work but anyway I I think the card with a picture of you guys on it with your phone number on the back is like a picture both of us two for one deal.

SPEAKER_02 23:34

Oh that might honestly I could see this working really well like on the pickleball courts if you see somebody they look like fun like I just mean to play with as a partner you know like I see a girl or something that's cute and I'm like and she's great pickleball player like hey you look like such a fun person to play pickleball with if you ever want to get together here you go and it's just like a card but like more cute like yeah so there's something about a business card that's off putting there's something about this that feels so real like a picture of your face with the phone number behind it it just feels so like what else yeah and you could always just keep like a pen around so like you can do your little heart with the phone number but then on the bottom it it could say like let's play sometime or call me or you know you know beautiful eyes or something like that.

SPEAKER_04 24:20

Wait a minute now this is getting two different directions are you giving this to girls in the pickleball court or not I that's what I was thinking of I could play with my beautiful eyes Natalie's got duo purpose she's like beautiful eyes plus you play really well you can have two boxes and check one check one you play really well check the other one beautiful eyes although that does bring I was gonna say that does bring me to like the stuff we did in elementary school middle school where it was the little like piece of paper that says do you like me check yes or no and I'm like oh I guess you could put on the back of it are you going to call me yes or no and see if they'll hand it back.

SPEAKER_02 25:04

I'm not requiring to no because they have to hang out no they they need the information is yes yes would be awesome if we create the page we might be able to do redirection ads like if we somehow had like got the metrics on like you know how many unique visitors were to the page what region where it was like what time we might even say oh I just gave this you know like are there like more popular times or not and if we were able to target it could be like a redirection ad like hey so have you called me yet because you seem really interested like don't be shy I gave you the green light.

SPEAKER_00 25:40

We could also sell ad space for local restaurants.

SPEAKER_02 25:43

We could monetize oh yes like oh and you know what happens once they get to the page we get all their cookies like all the information or whatever and then we on their social medias it starts feeding them like hey the perfect first date location is darra or like hey did you just randomly meet somebody did a girl like we could hire like actors like to have nothing to do with this did you just randomly meet a girl that came up to you and hit this is a really big sign from the universe that like your world is about to change I mean this would be like I mean honestly maybe perfect first date gifts diamonds yeah I I like it I can't even I'm so glad no one can see this video.

SPEAKER_04 26:23

Me in the background just like laughing it is no surprise that Natalie keeps asking what link she can get from the LDS church to show that she's a referral in because she's like like even the singles world she's like how do we turn this into a business let's sell ad space and send redirection ads and oh but yeah but think about it you can actually um you could probably start a really easy course like an entry level course on teaching people like this is what you do and and we do your love life.

SPEAKER_02 26:53

Yeah I would do the mental work about like how to get over the fear and anxiety and embarrassment like the worst thing that can happen right like Nikki you can set up all the ads Karina you can design them so they're beautiful like we can like I mean this podcast thing is not so lucrative.

SPEAKER_00 27:07

We could do this hey we don't know that yet um wait I have a question though I'm interested because you are hesitant to get on the apps and you feel like the apps are kind of embarrassing but you would be much more comfortable having a website for yourself and handing out pictures of yourself.

SPEAKER_02 27:24

Yes because they at least vetted like I saw them they were somewhere either that I thought was interesting I know that they are attractive I maybe saw that they had all their teeth they look like who they are I'm not like my picture isn't for like every guy who's interested in looking for somebody right it's like hey like this is just a little invitation to open the door here. You know I that feels much more comfortable to me.

SPEAKER_00 27:45

Okay. I mean you know that on dating apps you don't have to respond to everybody and you can like you Yeah but they all know that I'm on it. Yeah but they're on it too I know but it's different we're gonna have to unpack this at some point.

SPEAKER_02 27:59

And I was like do we need to do some thought work on this we need to send you to a sound bath so you can think on this we've been doing so many sound baths you don't even know so many sound baths sound baths meditations breath work journaling we have been doing all the rituals look at them try to convince me to come back oh that was very subtle we didn't like that with that we were not even selling there that was just we didn't manifest we didn't manifest that one hard enough we can do that tonight.

SPEAKER_04 28:27

That's a good there's still time to okay uh I don't I don't know if that's a good place to end but maybe that is the place unless you guys have more ideas for building this singles website. Oh yeah no I'm I'm uh I mean we could end in a moment of course but um I they have that what is that have you seen the the pitch your friend event like they put up the PowerPoint and then they pitch their friend like it's yeah similar to that it feels like I love that and actually you know what's so funny is the other thing the reason I liked the card thing is clearly I'm not single but I could have your cards on me and so like say the three of us are at an event and I see a guy that I think is cute and I could hand like it's like the perfect wingman situation. Because instead of them having to order you a drink or come over I can just hand and be like hey you see that girl over there you should she wants a drink so I mean I I think it's a really simple way to have a good wingman situation as well. I think it's brilliant.

SPEAKER_02 29:32

All right so when are you guys gonna do it oh maybe tonight uh Nikki do you want to design your cards?

SPEAKER_00 29:38

Wait why is it just my cards? Why am I the only one with cards?

SPEAKER_02 29:42

Because I feel scared I'm just recently out of a relationship.

SPEAKER_00 29:47

That is very you're not actively looking and it's true that you do need some time on your own before getting into something.

SPEAKER_04 29:55

But you should go ahead and design the cards don't hand them out tonight but just have them ready to go and maybe have them in your back pocket Nikki just in case because like there's always a just in case situation there's always a just in case it's true. Natalie doesn't think so but I think so no I agree I think and I think this is really really good. Yeah just so like just in case like you're like I'm not going to pan these cards out but perhaps there's this one person.

SPEAKER_02 30:24

Okay well isn't that how it always goes it's like oh I'll just be prepared but don't plan to use it and then like the universe delivers what you want because you showed like you were ready.

SPEAKER_04 30:35

Which brings me to the reel that Natalie sent us that we should talk about as we end today because that was such a good one and it's like such a good positive note. Natalie do you want to talk about it? Because it was great.

SPEAKER_02 30:47

Okay. So it was a reel about how manifestation works or how you pretty much can get what you want in life. And it was a woman and she sat down at a table and she's looking at a menu and she's really hungry and she wants french fries but french fries are not on the menu. No she wants pasta. Oh no no no she wants pasta but pasta's not on the menu so she orders french fries because French fries is I'm sorry I just couldn't fathom the idea that somebody didn't want french fries. I was gonna say that I changed tracks.

unknown 31:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 31:15

So so um the waitress comes over and she's like I'll have the french fries and they're like perfect great and then she looks over to somebody beside her and she's sitting at a table but she has pasta and the girl's like I wanted pasta that looks so good but they didn't have it on the menu. Karina take over from here because I said this a while ago and you just recently watched it.

SPEAKER_04 31:35

Oh yeah that's right okay so she sees the pasta and she was like I wanted pasta why like how did you get pasta and she was like oh you I just ordered it and she's like but it wasn't on the menu and she was like oh you silly there's no menu and she was like but I'm I have a menu right here and she's like and the only thing on it is french fries and she was like oh your parents gave you that menu it's not really real and she's like so I should just order pasta and she was like yeah if you want pasta order pasta. So the waitress comes back and she was like I'd actually much rather have the pasta and she's like okay and she walks away and she like she's sitting there thinking she's so proud of herself because pasta is gonna show up and what gets laid down in front of her French fries and she looks down at the french fries and she's like I got french fries and she looks over at the girl eating pasta and she's like what you said didn't work I'm I'm I got french fries and she's like um you gotta ask again and you got to tell her to take it away do you really want those french fries? Because clearly you want those french fries.

SPEAKER_02 32:37

Yeah and the girl's like the girl's like I'm I am really hungry I can just go ahead and eat the french fries and the girl's like but that's not what you want.

SPEAKER_04 32:44

Yeah and so it's like it takes a couple of times like the waitress takes away the french fries she brings back pasta puts it in front of her and it turns into french fries and she's like oh I it I almost had it right like I almost had the pasta but it turned into french fries and she was like I am hungry maybe I'll just eat it and the other one was like who was eating pasta was like well I mean if you want to give up basically yeah the universe is basically testing you do you really want this yeah and she was like okay I'm gonna ask again and so then the waitress comes and she's just like it's been so long I'm so hungry but she finally gets it the pasta and it's like very encouraging at the end of it like it is going to be hard. There are all these bumps the road the menu doesn't exist that you think exists like that you actually are choosing every piece of your life based on what you know not what you actually want.

SPEAKER_02 33:43

Yeah so the big things I took away from there is exactly that we can ask for anything we want it doesn't have to be prescribed something that we know people find acceptable something that has been taught to us we literally can just ask for whatever we want. We don't have to look to anyone else to get that permission and the other thing that really stood with me was just how non-reactive and non-emotional the universe was the universe was like oh you want this okay oh that was the wrong thing okay here you go oh it switched back okay here you go like the universe is just delivering what you want right it's just trying to give what you're putting out there. It doesn't have any investment either way.

SPEAKER_04 34:23

Yeah that I I thought it was such a good description of the way we all do our lives right we say we want something we get really close to it but then we just kind of give in because we're like well like I'm just gonna do whatever's in front of me. It's like way easier than waiting and doing the right thing that's right for you. But do we think that we are really good at choosing what we want and what's not on the menu like I think that's hard to think about what is it that I really want what are all the options because we all have this menu in our mind oh no I I recently got the download that I was not asking first of all not asking but also not asking big enough oh oh my gosh okay sorry we can't end there because Nikki you sent another one to me and I actually delivered on it okay so you sent one I am pretty sure at Natalie you have to go watch this one it was very fascinating. So this uh girl said one of the biggest life hacks is to get on your voice memo or whatever and to talk to yourself right now as your future self so you can listen to it. And you tell yourself like all the things you're grateful for, but also like what you're doing right now and all this stuff. So I was like you know what I'm gonna do that right now. I'm gonna make like a one minute recording like for me from five years from now what I think I'm gonna be doing but I'm just gonna act like it's already happened and or it's happening in real time. So I did it and I listened to it and I was like whoa this works like this is awesome. Like I already have it in my mind but it kind of makes it real and I've started tagging them with the date of when I recorded them because I think five years from now I'm gonna really want to go it's almost like what are those things where you you bury them for several years a time capsule beats a time capsule. A time capsule this is like voice memo time capsules but you're doing it for yourself and I'm excited to see you know in five years what I manifested what I talked about because I don't I don't know I don't know how I feel about manifesting but I'm like what I told myself I'm pretty sure not pretty sure I like it'll come true. Yeah I kind of want to see it.

SPEAKER_02 36:40

Nikki and I have been talking about this recently too the way that you described it is perfect. It's you are already living your dream life. So when we think a lot about when we're wishing manifesting praying we're we're it's all about like what we want like um I can't wait to find the love of my life or I will find the love of my life I will make a lot of money and it that statement is always you don't have it. You're always in pursuit of it. So if you go and you jump to the time of you already having it you get to live in that feeling and those thoughts and that emotion of it's already yours instead of I want it's I have and so I think that's an important like switch in our mind.

SPEAKER_04 37:22

We were joking uh this morning to the song like baby where the hell is my husband we're like yeah that's not a good song because like you're always going to be looking so then we change the lyrics like baby I F and love my husband he is amazing and he loves me like it was just like you you have to be careful right so it's a it's important yeah we're um we're very high vibe over here we are very high vibe could be high vibe over here with us to oh I your vibes are so high they're all the way in Utah like from Phoenix all the way to Utah I can feel it I was feeling it through Instagram while I was watching all those reels last night.

SPEAKER_02 38:03

I think I might make that a thing to do we should go through the reels tonight Nikki of the Three of Cups catch up and then I think we should record our voice memos.

SPEAKER_00 38:10

That is a good idea because I totally forgot to do that. And actually I was thinking I could see myself getting off of this podcast episode, forgetting about it and then when future self listened to this episode being like damn it's time. So yeah that is that is the funny thing is we can buy a pasta and French fries because now I really want pasta and french fries. Oh we can do that. See all I had to do was ask.

SPEAKER_02 38:32

Wait just to say like what you said there I think my favorite part about this podcast is its accountability like because you said like you wouldn't do it and then you'll listen to this podcast later and because we're so far ahead it's like oh yeah I said I was gonna do this and I didn't do it. I love it. It's like my own self being accountable to it.

SPEAKER_04 38:49

I I love it because then I write notes about all the things that we said we were gonna do and we didn't take care of like I actually have a list of like watching chitty chitty bang bang on Monday when you fly in chitty chitty bang bang. Yeah that kind of stuff it's silly stuff but also I love listening back and I don't listen back to my own I have two other podcasts I don't listen back to those but I listen to ours because it's a good reminder of things that I want or things I'm supposed to be working on or it's also just a good reminder of our friendship. And sometimes you guys will say something I don't know if people who listen catch it but I catch it like that's like a good business tip. Like you don't even realize it like Nikki I'm Natalie said a couple of things earlier today. I was like that's a great business tip if anybody like you if you had a regular business and you were handing out cards and then you built a landing page and then it like redirected you and then you had ads and then you had like a I was like I mean she laid out a plan for anybody who wants to start a business in this episode you know that's actually a really great thing yeah like it if you want to promote your podcast if you like you're just out and about like what a lovely just kind of fun thing.

SPEAKER_02 39:59

I don't know that's true. All right I think we're done with this one.

SPEAKER_04 40:04

We'll see you guys next week.